I feel invisible ALL the time...

-Like everyone here looks THROUGH me-
Like I was never even here
Like I will never matter

sometimes...
I know there is nothing wrong with me,
but most of the time I feel worthless.
sometimes...
I have this great sense of self-image,
but the smallest things can eradicate that.

So most of the time, I feel ugly, stupid, awkward.
So most of the time, I doubt everything about me.
So most of the time, I just want to die, so it'll stop.

And I do wonder - would they notice me if I were dead? Would they love me then? Would they show up at my funeral, finally saying sweet words? :-( I wouldn't know it if they did, but at least I'd no longer be suffering either... I'm so fucking lonely here... I just want to sleep ;_;